Yennage
Well-known member
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2011
- Messages
- 1,677
- Thread Author
- #1
Hey guys! I don't know about the rest of you but as a regular PC gamer, I'm a huge fan of nachos, however, usually I'm restricted by laziness to just shovelling them directly from the bag into my mouth (and occasionally all over my keyboard), however, today I figured I'd go all out and have some fully fledged, properly professional protein packed nachos!
Step 1 -- Assemble the freshest of ingredients (for a health conscious snack like nachos, using only the best natural produce is a must):
From the left, there's Tesco mild salsa dip (I'm not a fan of spicy foods), Pre-grated extra mature cheddar cheese, smoked streaky bacon, all new Kettle Chip tortilla chips and finally, the awesomiser itself, Aromat.
Step 2 -- Layer that tasty bacon into the pan:
Protip: ALWAYS fry your bacon! I hear CommanderFluffy has microwaved bacon... That's nothing short of sacrilege!
Step 3 -- Tend very carefully to your bacon:
Protip: Keep an eye on the cardboard pizza box in the background! It's totally foreshadowing!
Step 4 -- Pack your baking tray with cardboard to minimise washing up:
Protip: If the cardboard comes from food packaging it's totally safe to use, after all, why else would they use it?
Step 5 -- Toss your tortilla chips onto your newly prepared cardboard base:
Protip: Use origami skills to ensure the cardboard stays flat to the tray!
Step 6 -- Throw your cheese on top
Protip: Pre-grated cheese doesn't taste the same as the regular stuff... It's got some weird coating to it to stop it sticking together that tastes bizarre
Step 7 -- Throw your cardboard creation into the oven:
Protip: Pre-research the ignition point of cardboard (450 degrees celsius) so you know it's not going to catch fire in the oven!
Step 8 -- You thought bacon couldn't get any better? Think again:
Protip: Aromat combines the flavour enhancing powers of BOTH salt and MSG, literally you can put this on any food and it'll taste oh so much better!
Step 9 -- Remove your jury-rigged tray from the oven:
Protip: Don't worry about any strange chemical smells that are emitted from the oven during cooking, it's just the essential inks infusing from the cardboard into the chips (I presume?)
Step 10 -- Toss on the dip:
Protip: Use the whole lot of the dip, I once tried Dorito dip on toast to use up some excess I had once... It was awful.
Step 11 -- Plate up the bacon:
Protip: Hone your spatula skills, in the tense moments in your kitchen, zen-like calm when wielding the spatula is essential.
Step 12 -- Inspect how well your cardboard held up with pride:
Protip: It seriously holds up a LOT better than what I was expecting at 220 degrees in the oven
Step 13 -- Assemble your terrific snack and dig in:
Protip: Get in close so it's impossible to see how precariously your food is stacked on the plate
Well that was actually pretty nice, I was pretty impressed that the cardboard didn't even particularly singe (seriously, not even on the side that was flat to the baking tray), although I had to open literally all my doors and windows to get enough airflow so that I wasn't concerned about the smell of melting ink. The nachos themselves were also pretty tasty (kettle chip tortilla chips were great!) although I wish I'd spent the extra £1.50 on Doritos brand dip... The Tesco one had barely any onion in it... Also as a forewarning, the hnnngh constricted aorta feeling you get after eating this is pretty intense but easily "cured" with a nice energy drink! Woo!!!
As always, meal suggestions are always a welcome break, especially as I'm now facing 4 days straight of margherita pizza!
Step 1 -- Assemble the freshest of ingredients (for a health conscious snack like nachos, using only the best natural produce is a must):
From the left, there's Tesco mild salsa dip (I'm not a fan of spicy foods), Pre-grated extra mature cheddar cheese, smoked streaky bacon, all new Kettle Chip tortilla chips and finally, the awesomiser itself, Aromat.
Step 2 -- Layer that tasty bacon into the pan:
Protip: ALWAYS fry your bacon! I hear CommanderFluffy has microwaved bacon... That's nothing short of sacrilege!
Step 3 -- Tend very carefully to your bacon:
Protip: Keep an eye on the cardboard pizza box in the background! It's totally foreshadowing!
Step 4 -- Pack your baking tray with cardboard to minimise washing up:
Protip: If the cardboard comes from food packaging it's totally safe to use, after all, why else would they use it?
Step 5 -- Toss your tortilla chips onto your newly prepared cardboard base:
Protip: Use origami skills to ensure the cardboard stays flat to the tray!
Step 6 -- Throw your cheese on top
Protip: Pre-grated cheese doesn't taste the same as the regular stuff... It's got some weird coating to it to stop it sticking together that tastes bizarre
Step 7 -- Throw your cardboard creation into the oven:
Protip: Pre-research the ignition point of cardboard (450 degrees celsius) so you know it's not going to catch fire in the oven!
Step 8 -- You thought bacon couldn't get any better? Think again:
Protip: Aromat combines the flavour enhancing powers of BOTH salt and MSG, literally you can put this on any food and it'll taste oh so much better!
Step 9 -- Remove your jury-rigged tray from the oven:
Protip: Don't worry about any strange chemical smells that are emitted from the oven during cooking, it's just the essential inks infusing from the cardboard into the chips (I presume?)
Step 10 -- Toss on the dip:
Protip: Use the whole lot of the dip, I once tried Dorito dip on toast to use up some excess I had once... It was awful.
Step 11 -- Plate up the bacon:
Protip: Hone your spatula skills, in the tense moments in your kitchen, zen-like calm when wielding the spatula is essential.
Step 12 -- Inspect how well your cardboard held up with pride:
Protip: It seriously holds up a LOT better than what I was expecting at 220 degrees in the oven
Step 13 -- Assemble your terrific snack and dig in:
Protip: Get in close so it's impossible to see how precariously your food is stacked on the plate
Well that was actually pretty nice, I was pretty impressed that the cardboard didn't even particularly singe (seriously, not even on the side that was flat to the baking tray), although I had to open literally all my doors and windows to get enough airflow so that I wasn't concerned about the smell of melting ink. The nachos themselves were also pretty tasty (kettle chip tortilla chips were great!) although I wish I'd spent the extra £1.50 on Doritos brand dip... The Tesco one had barely any onion in it... Also as a forewarning, the hnnngh constricted aorta feeling you get after eating this is pretty intense but easily "cured" with a nice energy drink! Woo!!!
As always, meal suggestions are always a welcome break, especially as I'm now facing 4 days straight of margherita pizza!
keep up the good... no great work! also, yen for master chef! anyone with me?